Day 2

Dear ER technician, I hath been gifted thy germ trifecta--all germs that  plagued our kids have declared me the "ultimate host." Yet, I am confused. It seems that there has been a mistake. While I have accepted the new reigning position of "Ultimate Host" my prior responsibilities have not been transferred?! It appears that even as reigning germ queen I am still able to be woken with a child vomitting on the bed, a bedwetting accident, a child vomitting in the sink, breakfast to be made, as well as a couple lunches awaiting their construction. I would like to propose that upon receiving the title of "Ultimate Host," said recipient is relieved from previous duties as she now has new ones that consist of sleeping and drugging and excessive bathroom use. It has been my observation that this proposal is not unique to other family members but has yet to be applied to said "Ultimate Host" unless said host is hospitalized. Therefore, it was only under the most dire of circumstances that I drank an excessive amount of cough syrup in hopes of landing in your establishment for a day or so. Unfortunately, it seems that it was unsuccessful and all that it has done has made the journey to do the laundry much like an adventure from Jumanji.